The Eulogy
by kittycatwhobarks
Summary: Severus's experience of loving and losing Hermione. A bit dark. Romantic.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters. I am simply inspired by them. I may have taken certain grammatical liberties in this piece, but if anything stands out as particularly wrong, please let me know. I write because I enjoy doing so, but I post because I want to become the best writer that I can be. Let me know what you think- content wise,grammatically, or whatever els.e I fear it may be too mushy for my taste, but this idea just stuck with me and I had to get it out.

A Eulogy to Love in the Form of a Short Story

If I am hot and you are cold.

If you are dark and I am light.

If I am emotional and you are logical.

If you are strong and I am weak.

If I am passion and you are precision.

Then, perhaps ,we complete each other.

You are my yang and I am your yin.

Friend

Teacher

Lover

Mouth to mouth.

Skin to skin.

Eyes to eyes.

Sensations on edge.

I remember the way we felt that first time:

Scared.

Intrigued.

Aroused.

Besotted.

You are an artist and I am your muse.

My body, your canvas.

My heart, irrevocably, yours.

The dungeons- dark ,bleak, empty- just like his heart until she showed him that in forgiveness, there is peace, in letting go, there is pride, and in love, there is hope.

Hope. A word Severus almost forget existed for the life of a double spy is never easy. She reminded him that everything he did was worth the price for in the end he helped save thousands of lives- a feat most people can't even imagine or dare to desire.

It was this revelation that brought him back to life. And her. Hermione. Such a sweet and innocent name for a young woman who suffered through so many trials and tribulations. She understood some of his pain. Like him, she lost a friend and a lover. He-Lily and she- Ron. Lily and Ron were magnificent people who fought for what they believed in, but sadly, life, God or maybe simply war took them from this world. When Lily died Severus thought that he would never love again- a silly notion for the heart has the capacity for so much love and passion. He found out the hard way. But the hardships was worth it for love knows no boundaries. Love cannot be constrained, denied, or controlled. One can try, but alas, humans are meant to fall in love over and over again throughout their lives- be it with the same person or with many. Severus discovered this to be true. Once, when he was a young man he loved a fiery red head whose heart belonged to another, but years later another came into his life, and the experience was cathartic, visceral, passionate and…reciprocated.

The dungeon door slammed shut. Her body collided with the wall as he lost all control. It would be unfair to say that this wasn't lust. It was. But it was also so much more. Their lips met in a powerful kiss, but their eyes remained opened for they wanted to see the other surrender to the physical and emotional complexities of this unlikely union. This was, in fact, quite complex for it took them years to give up all acts of propriety and just be. However, when they did allow themselves to be, it felt right. Not perfect. Not forever. Just right. And so, as their clothes came off ,so did their hard exteriors- no longer was he Severus Snape, head of Slytherin house, double spy, ex-death eater, potion master extraordinaire, but just Severus, a man, and no longer was she the Gryffindor princess, know-it-all, Harry Potter's best friend, most -sought-after -healer, but just Hermione, a woman. They were in love, and so in the dark crevices of the dungeon they showed one another just how much they loved each other. They did not exchange sentimental words, or laugh, or even moan. They made love - as silently as the world is when dawn and darkness intertwine, but as passionately as Guinevere and Lancelot, Romeo and Juliet, the great lovers of some of the most powerful literature written in history. They understood that their relationship was not perfect, that they were not perfect, but in that moment nothing else mattered but being together for however long it was possible

However cliché,

However too much,

However hopeless,

I am inspired.

I am fascinated.

I am yours.

Not forever.

Not for eternity.

But for now.

For however long it can last.

For whatever we mean to each other today,

I will not take for granted that you have loved me and I, you.

Reflected light shone from the silhouettes of the bodies of the two lovers. Hermione opened her eyes and gazed at the sleeping man beside her. 'This is it,' she thought, 'time to part ways, for good.' She leaned in and gently kissed his parted lips.

He opened his eyes and said, " I love you." A tear rolled down Hermione's cheek as she struggled to dis-tangle herself from his body.

She quickly dressed and turned towards the door. Taking a deep breathe, she turned to Severus, and whispered, " I wish you every happiness."

" And I, you" was his reply. With a bittersweet smile, Hermione Granger departed from Severus Snape's life for the final time.

Their affair had ended. She went back to her husband and he, to a lonely existence. 'I don't mind the pain,' he thought, 'for at least I learned that I am capable of loving and perhaps I'll feel this way again someday soon.'

Love is a gift that should not be taken for granted- even if it doesn't last because someone wise once said, " it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all." A warning to all: give in to your emotions with everything that you have for as humans, we have the ability to be broken and be put back together again. Risk it all ( unless, it is illegal or amoral) for love, friendship, passion, and knowledge is always worth the price of heart break. That is how we grow- as people, as a society, as scholars, as writers, as readers, as parents, as friends, as lovers.


	2. Alternative Ending, Part 1

Disclaimer: This is for ExAmoreDolorem who has patiently been waiting for an alternative ending. My imagination has run away with me, so this ending will be spread into a couple of chapters.

Enjoy!

~ Their stories will always continue because our devotion is as endless as our imaginations~

**Alternative Ending for **_**the Eulogy**_

Three years had come and gone since Hermione and Severus parted for the last time.

Neither knew what had become of the other, always turning the other ear when conversation about the other was in progress. It hurt too much to know.

'Is she happy? Is she pregnant?' He wondered.

"Is he happy? Is he married now?' She pondered.

They both yearned to know how the other was doing but couldn't bear it. In the most humanly wretched part of their hearts, they both hoped the other was miserable without them.

Three years had come and gone. A lot has happened since they made love for the last time. But hearts have remained the same, in love and pining for the freedom that past choices have made nearly impossible.

_Reflected light shone from the silhouettes of the bodies of the two lovers. Hermione opened her eyes and gazed at the sleeping man beside her. 'This is it,' she thought, 'time to part ways, for good.' She leaned in and gently kissed his parted lips._

_He opened his eyes and said, "I love you." A tear rolled down Hermione's cheek as she struggled to dis-tangle herself from his body._

_She quickly dressed and turned towards the door. Taking a deep breathe, she turned to Severus, and whispered, "I wish you every happiness."_

"_And I, you" was his reply. With a bittersweet smile, Hermione Granger departed from Severus Snape's life for the final time._

_Their affair had ended. She went back to her husband and he, to a lonely existence. 'I don't mind the pain,' he thought, 'for at least I learned that I am capable of loving and perhaps I'll feel this way again someday soon.'_

I wish you every happiness, she said to him, three years ago.

'What a joke," Hermione muttered to herself as she stared into her coffee cup.

Sighing, Hermione took another sip and looked around her small apartment. Even after a year, it STILL felt strange to live alone. But it also felt nice.

Freeing, really. Shame that such a feeling came with so much guilt.

She grabbed her cup, went into the living room, opened the curtains, and sat on the floor.

Lifting her arms up into the air, she stretched her arms, then her fingers- slowly, languidly- as she inhaled deeply.

She let the breath go, imagining all her regrets attached to that breath, that breath that was no longer inside her.

Satisfied, Hermione finished her coffee and got up to get ready for work.

She tried. She really, really did try to make things work.

She loved him, once.

But love has a funny way of coming and going, consequences be damned.

A year after graduating from Hogwarts, Ron proposed to Hermione, and they were married on the Hogwarts Express a year later. It was a beautiful wedding—so full of love and joy and laughter and memories and promises. They were happily married for three years before problems started surfacing.

It wasn't anything in particular. He didn't do anything wrong. She didn't do anything wrong. But they argued all the time, over this and that. Little things. Big things. House things. Social things. Personal things. Over and over and over until they could barely stand the sight of each other.

But, God, Hermione loved Ron. She LOVED him. So very much. And Ron loved Hermione. He LOVED her. So very much.

"How did we get here?" She kept asking. "I don't know," He replied. Each and every time.

There is only so much that can be said and done until silence, memories, and fear are all that remains.

But they were both too afraid to say goodbye, because what would happen if they said goodbye?

It was during all this that Hermione ran into Severus Snape again. The man hadn't changed. Not really.

A new little bookshop opened up in town. Hermione could not wait to check it out. One late afternoon, she went in. A little melody went off as she came in, notifying the bookshop owner that someone came in. He smiled at Hermione, who smiled back, before gazing around in wonder. She strolled through the shelves, gazing at the titles. So many books to choose from!

'How will I ever leave?' She thought out loud.

"Perhaps, you will finally realize that no matter how many books you read, there will always be more to learn, more to perfect," drawled a familiar voice.

Hermione looked up to see Severus Snape leaning against a book shelf.

Without thinking, she turned to face him and smacked him hard across his face.

"How dare you?!"

She stormed away before he had a chance to respond.

Severus stared as Hermione quickly walked away. "Well, now…."

Somehow, in some crazy way, that was the start of it all.

A/N: Stay tuned for the next part! Review, too! Woohooo

~ Their stories will always continue because our devotion is as endless as our imaginations~


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